Option B: Care for yourself & others during hardship

At some point, we all live an Option B

Grief and hardship are part of life—and no one should have to go through them alone. We’re here to help you take care of yourself and support your loved ones through life’s most challenging moments.

Find ways to care for yourself Learn how to show up for others

Caring for yourself

Everyone’s path through hardship is different. But no matter where you are on your journey, these everyday practices can help.

Illustration of a sad man with hand on forehead

Feel your feelings

None of us want to be sad, angry, or scared. But research shows that letting yourself fully experience your emotions can help you start to heal.

Share what you’re going through

Starting a conversation about your Option B might feel awkward, but it’s almost always worth it. These tips can help you find the right listener and break the ice.

Illustration of person holding two boxes, one box says “grief” and the other says “joy”

Hold both struggle and joy

You don’t need to be “done” with hardship to feel joy. Learn how to embrace moments of peace and happiness, even when they’re mixed with sadness and pain.

Find more ways to care for yourself

Being there for someone who’s struggling

When someone you love is going through a tough time, it can be hard to know what to say or do. Here’s how to show up when it matters most.

Illustration of man and woman walking together

How to talk to someone about stress, trauma, or loss

We often hesitate to mention a loved one’s hardship because we don’t want to say the wrong thing. But speaking up shows you care, even if your words aren’t perfect.

Illustration of woman holding phone and texting

Show up—small acts matter

Instead of saying, “Let me know if there’s anything I can do,” just do something. Offer to run an errand or make dinner. Text your loved one to say you’re thinking of them—and let them know you don’t need a response.

Illustration of a hand marking date on a calendar

Be there for the long haul

People going through hardship often feel alone after the initial wave of support has passed. You can help by letting your loved one know they can always lean on you.

Find more ways to show up for others

Option B Stories

When you’re facing one of life’s hardest moments, it can help to hear directly from people who’ve been there. Explore stories of loss, hardship, and healing.

“I’ve become a different person since Nap died, in often contradicting ways. I am quicker to anger and to well up with tears. I am also quicker to laugh and drop the ‘shoulds’ to spend time doing nothing with someone I love.”

—Janine Kwoh

Read Janine’s story

“I would have given anything for friends who could ask, ‘How are you holding up? How are you coping? How are you doing today?’”

—Julie Lythcott-Haims

Read Julie’s story

“Today, I am not a victim. I am a thriving survivor. But I know that I will be recovering for the rest of my life.”

—Lauren Book

Read Lauren’s story

“[Struggling people] are all around, bravely holding on to the present and terrified about the future. If you know them, intrude on their privacy by reaching out, even if they turn you away.”

—Katie Couric

Read Katie’s story

“Addiction runs in my family and I was no exception.”

—Christopher Poulos

Read Christopher’s story

“I always tried to fix my loss, to fill the gap. Now I know some things cannot be fixed; they need to be carried.”

—Wiebke Frömchen

Read Wiebke’s story

Resources for Grief

Processing Grief

Grief is one of life’s most universal hardships — but it’s also deeply personal. Our resources can help you understand common practices that help with processing grief, so you can find what works best for you and your loved ones. You can also join our Coping with Grief Facebook group to connect with a community of people around the world who’ve experienced different types of grief and loss.

Find ways to navigate grief

Two people hugging with “Option B coping with grief” in the center of the image

Option B Group

Coping with Grief Group

Connect with a community of 25K people around the world who share their experiences with grief openly and honestly and provide everyday support for one another.

Join the group